| | | | | Bo Fo' Sho' - 193 sec http://goto.thesyn.com/boburnham/
Mini ALBUM RELEASE on JUNE 17th on itunes!
six-songs, three of them never before seen on the internet. the ep is called "Bo fo Sho"
beat and lyrics by bo burnham
walkin my poodles, man it never gets old
with my dogs on my leash i got bitches on the hold,
a first aids kit? thats a rhesus monkey,
i bust more nuts than a pistachio junkie!
get more ass than a giant donkey stable,
got more lines than whitney houston's coffee table,
i get more head than grammar school lice,
i'm like a walkin glacier i'm so decked out with ice.
Did you poop a virgin? cause that shit is tight.
jack ain't black, barry ain't white.
i do drugs in the bedroom, lie on ur back
cause i got the pipe and you got the crack.
though i'm sexually straight, your bound to find,
i'm mentally gay, cause i'll blow your mind.
the parents be snickerin "he shouldnt have written it"
but i'm constipated, couldnt give a shit.
chorus:
My name is bo fo sho,
a born bostonian,
aryan librarian at the WORDsmithsonian
the rap is scattered, it hides its ingenuity,
i gave it this little part to give it continuity.
the fellas say
hey moron pass the gin
cause i'm an OXYmoron breathing OXYgen
give me the bottle, i'll chug two thirds
cause you bitches know fractions speak louder than words
and the ladies say
hey fellas i'm keepin it tight and if you play ur cards right you can have me tonight
should i blow you or beat you, brass or percussion?
oh stop, PERIOD end of discussion
chorus...
walking through the garden with food at my feet, picked up the celery but dropped the beat (beet).
we're in the hood ill take what you give me
was einstein's theory good...relatively
a smart queen's kingdumb, it doesnt mix
a litter of literates, a bunch of moby dicks
"get thee to a punnery" o-just to-pheelia
take you with a condomn "stainless-steal" ya.
half a pound of turkey breast, half a pound of chicken tits,
why are only crackers staying at the Ritz?
poverty, racism, isn't it strange,
that only the homeless are beggin for change?
i shocked Sherlock
What, son? (watson) (watt, son?)
Rosa Parks didnt call "shotgun"!
here's a bit of irony
a Ford Focus driver has ADD
How'd i come to master all these things?
like a tampon theif, i had to pull some strings. Tags: rap awkward bo burnham boburnham puns wordplay sort of feminine  | | | | | | | | New Math - 247 sec http://goto.thesyn.com/boburnham/
three of them never before seen on the internet. the ep is called "Bo fo Sho"
music and lyrics by bo burnham
whats a pirate minus the ship? just a creative homeless guy,
and an anteater plus a large hungry mutant ant? an ironic way to die
and whats domain, domain, range (xxy) a kid with too much in his pants
and two balls minus one, six titles at the tour de france.
split a decision with long division,
take the circumference of your circumcision
live like your data and when you're all "set"
put it all together and whatever you get.
is new math...
whats a bag of chips divided by five, thats a nike worker's meal
and santa clause mutliplied by "i" well i guess that makes him real,
and the square root of the NBA is Africa in a box,
how do u trace a scatter plot? give the pencil to michael j fox.
take the approximate moral proportion of the probable problem of a pro-life abortion
live like your data, and when youre all "set"
put it all together and whatever you get...
is new math.
and if you made a factor tree of the factors that caused my girl to leave me youd have a tree...
full of asian porn.
C-A-L-C-U-LATOR (see you later) mathetmatical minds make industrial smog.
and whats the opposite of lnx, duraflame the unnatural log.
support the farmers with a pro-tractor,
link kennedy and lincoln with a common factor (fact, or)
live like ur data...blah blah
word problems
if theres a fat guy in a pastry shop with a twenty dollar bill and he's ready to buy,
in order to predict his volume change you need to know the value of pi (pie)
and theres a metal train that a mile long and at the very back end a lightning bolt struck her,
how long til it reaches adn kills the driver, provided that he's a good conductor,
and if ten percent of men are gay and twenty percent of men are chinese, what are the odds that a men chosen at random spends his freetime and mealtime while on his knees
and if kim is half as old as bobby who is two years older then twelve year old tori,
for how many more 30 day months will their threesomes be considered statutory rape
cause havin sex is like quadratic expansion if it cant be split then its time to stop,
and havin sex is like doing fractions, its improper for the larger one to be on top,
and havin sex is like math homework, i do it best when i'm alone in my bed.
and squarin numbers are just like women, if theyre under thirteen just do them in your head....
and new math Tags: bo burnham boburnham new math song guitar funny offensive silly wordplay stand-up | | | | Re: BoBurnham Honda Commercial - 64 sec shannon (impersonating) vanessa (crying), and kimberly (filming) who all love bo very very much and want him to add us on facebook, decided to throw a slumber party where we spent most of the night naked and making out with one another. we got clothed strictly so that our video would not be deleted off of youtube. and thus, we dedicate this video to our mutual love, mr.burnham, and if you are reading this, we love you. a lot. Tags: bo burnham marianopolis honda commercial | | |
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